Screamfest: Right-wing Science Fiction Coming to a Legislature Near You

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Mad non-scientists in the Arizona legislature and governor’s mansion have devised a remarkable method of creating human life prior to fertilization: pass a law. Yes Igor, that is one wacky la-BOR-a–tory they’re running out there. At least in Arizona the gestational period begins on the first day of a woman’s last period, meaning (wink,wink) the state may further restrict the point in her pregnancy when an abortion is permissible.

Forget “the war on women”: this makes sperm only incidental to the process it appears, or at least demotes its significance decidedly. Talk about losing potency. For all we know the next theocratic decree might declare all births going forward were immaculately conceived. On the bright side, it really takes the steam out of the contraception debate: Frankly, I always believed sperm was a hoax cooked up by high school guidance counselors, ministers and parents to deter me from having fun.

What is most shocking to me about Arizona is that they stopped short of dealing as creatively with the other end of life, passing a law extending life beyond death. At the very least the law should recognize you as still alive as long as your fingernails continue to grow. There’s two, maybe three more Social Security checks in that and somebody could use the money. In fact, if they’d just pass a law permitting one to make purchases after ceasing to breathe the economy could get a real boost. This seems like a stimulus package even Republicans could find favor with. It’s as easy as passing a law and signing it.

In Tennessee and Louisiana they have cracked down on godlessness and the liberal chicanery known in common parlance as science by passing laws allowing teachers to “explore the scientific strengths and scientific weaknesses” of climate change and evolution. How I wish that in my day laws had been passed allowing teachers to explore the mathematical strengths and weaknesses of algebra, a legal remedy of great use to future English majors such as myself looking for less painful alternatives to truly inconvenient equations.

Again, why Tennessee and Louisiana have not taken the additional step of legally reversing changed migration patterns and melting glaciers, and undoing monster tornados and roasting forests remains a puzzle. One source of trouble they conspicuously failed to address is the Weather Channel. A ban on this purveyor of dubious happenings from cable lineups would go a long way toward creating a new and accurate scientific consensus. Making it seem as though weather is happening is liberal bias of the most insidious sort.

I’m all for codifying Intelligent Design as settled curriculum as long as it is accompanied by tort reform. If this place is supposed to be intelligently designed I’ve got some real complaints, and restrictions on damages have got to go. There is no end to the pain and suffering this flawed design has caused, and no small amount in damages punitive and compensatory is due. This is too scary a movie Tennessee and I want my money back.

Soviets Tutor Republicans in Reality Prevention

When a “senior advisor” in the Bush administration reminded reporter Ron Suskind that Suskind was “a member of the reality-based community” noting, “We create our own reality,” he assumed he and the Bush apparatchiks were in the vanguard of reality creation. As Republicans carve out and build out an alternate reality where evolution is a wild idea rather than settled science, where climate scientists are conspirators rather than bearers of data, and where for any fact you’ve got they’ve got an ideologically compatible fantasy fact it’s important to remember the debt they owe to the groundbreaking reality denial work done in the former Soviet Union, the model for their own science and reality vs. ideology mode.

The Stalinists originated the snappy label “bourgeois pseudoscience” for the ideologically inconvenient fields of genetics, cybernetics, sociology, semiotics and comparative linguistics, all deemed ideologically unacceptable. Whether climate science ever ran afoul of ideological correctness at the time I couldn’t say. In Mao’s China, anesthesia was verboten, pain relief through acupuncture the only ideologically permissible means.

The specific practice of manipulation of science for predetermined ideological ends had its own name: Lysenkoism, after Trofim Lysenko, an agronomist whose principal research involved wheat seeds, but touched upon something called “acquired characteristics,” a bogus theory that inherited traits could be actively changed through intervention. Soviet ideologists thought the theory of acquired characteristics was swell, because they liked to insist and found it convenient to insist that heredity played little part in human development, and that through life under Leninism bourgeois and fascist instincts would be purged.

Mainstream economists are often astounded that conservatives and Republicans continue to promote “voodoo economics” or “supply-side” no matter how economically disastrous such policies unvaryingly are. Educated people everywhere are astonished at Republican rejection of human-caused climate change in the face of staggering amounts of evidentiary data supporting it, or shocked when conservatives seek to remove evolution from school textbooks or to equate Biblical narratives with scientific theory. When collective farming bombed in the Soviet Union and millions starved, Stalin told the nation when he eased back on the policy that the nation had “overfilled the five-year plan of collectivization by more than 100%,” and that, “some of our comrades have become dizzy with success.” How about them apples, James Inhofe?

Adapting the practices of dastardly dictatorships doesn’t make one as dastardly by any stretch. But it is a conspicuous indicator of a very bad turn in direction. It’s one thing when opposing philosophies differ on how to solve problems. It’s another thing altogether when one philosophy denies the problems even exist at all. It’s worthwhile to stipulate American conservatives haven’t done anything to equal the death of millions through the ideologically determined collectivization of agriculture.
But let’s be clear: failure to adequately regulate, or reducing necessary regulation of polluters or carbon emissions means the proliferation of particulates in the air, and the innumerable preventable deaths pulmonary disease will cause. Political demonization of the poor, propaganda designed to convince Americans dire poverty doesn’t exist in America or is mostly voluntary results in policies that materially and physically punish, even to the point of death. Endless denial of the correctible profit-driven deficiencies in the American health system, or dissemination of falsification and myth about superior single-payer plans around the world indirectly but literally kills no small number of Americans. What can be said for denial of warnings from climate scientists is that the window is rapidly closing for the necessary adaptions capable of preventing consequences potentially catastrophic.

Republicans with their massive media and propaganda machinery understand one thing at least that is undeniably real: the assumption since the Enlightenment that rational people will reject a hypothesis when contradicted by empirical evidence is much too optimistic. In practice, when data and belief collide it is often belief that wins the day. In other words, when pitted against Limbaugh and O’ Reilly, Bacon and Descartes do not fare well.

Whatever can be said about the current radicalized right’s antipathy to inconvenient science and perpetuation of distrust of science, and more broadly of academia and learning, it can be stated definitively we have passed the point of it being merely alarming.

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